I admit that autumn is not my favourite season. Although I welcome the (slightly) cooler weather with joy and appreciate the beautiful colours of autumnal trees, it is also a season that confronts me with the temporariness of things. Today they are here. Tomorrow, they may be gone. In that context, celebrating my birthday in November is a blessing and a curse. A blessing, giving thanks for everything; a curse for the falling leaves remind me of the day that I myself will have to say goodbye to everything. Of course, as a Christian, I believe that such a goodbye is not the end of all, but for now, and despite all its challenges, I enjoy my life and my family and friends and pray that many more good things may come for all of us. But the leaves are falling, one by one.
In the meantime, the building project is also reaching an autumnal stage. More and more spaces in the house are being cleared of stuff. The library is getting emptier as boxes of books are being moved to their new destination in the university library. Some walls and doors in the big tower have been redone, and other places are being developed but still need to be finished. The walls are industrial white, waiting for some colours, almost like a winter landscape waiting for spring. The rebuilding plan for the lower tower has now been given the green light, so we can start to look for building companies to do the work.
Walking around the building today, I contemplated what would remain and what would go. And the same is true when looking back on my own life. But just before my thoughts ran into deep and murky waters, an oversized parcel arrived.
Opening up the package, I found two presents and a card full of best wishes for my birthday from the students and parishioners at the Eendrachtskapel in Rotterdam. It was as if they had read my mind and positively corrected me. Instead of allowing me to focus too much on what I had left behind, the card was celebrating the bonds and friendships that were created and will continue. It made me smile and lifted my heart. Leaves may continue to fall, but maybe autumn is not so bad after all, for it makes visible the essence of what remains: love, hope, and friendship.